Tokyo3 Afterlife
by Random1377
Summary: Being dead kind of sucks...
1. Death and Jellyfish

Disclaimer: I don't own EVA. If the owners say to, I'll take this story offline. Thanks.

Tokyo-3 Afterlife

Part 1 of… some?

Death and Jellyfish

By Random1377

At exactly three-fifteen on a bright, sunny afternoon, Asuka Langley Souryu was hit by a semi truck on her way home from school and killed instantly.

On a scale of one to ten, with one being pleasant and ten being the worst thing that had ever happened to her, Asuka rated this event at about an eight point five.

"You've gotta be kidding me," she groused as she stared down at her broken body, "that was my favorite shirt!"

She couldn't say much for the funeral, either. Hikari, predictably, sobbed like a baby… as did Shinji, but everyone else maintained grim stoicism, keeping themselves to discrete eye-dabbing – for Misato and Maya – and dull-eyed stares – for Ritsuko and the rest of the bridge crew… though Asuka had the annoying impression that the good doctor was thinking about something else.

"Stupid cow," Asuka muttered, folding her ethereal arms and leaning up against a tree, "can't even be bothered to look sad that I'm gone – and where the hell is Wondergirl? What, since she wasn't _ordered_ to be here… oh forget it. She's probably with the Commander. Shisse… your best pilot dies and you don't even go to the funeral."

Feeling bored, she pushed away from the tree, idly trailing after Ritsuko as the woman left the funeral.

"Time to touch up your roots," she said as loudly as she could… which was to say, only she could hear it.

So far, though she had tried with everyone she came across at first, no one could hear a word she was saying, and finally, she just gave up, wandering from place to place with nothing else to do.

It was kind of liberating, she supposed as she passed effortlessly through the passenger door of Ritsuko's. No one could give her a hard time, no one could tell her what to do, and no one could ever say that she was slacking off in her Kanji studies again, that was for damn sure.

Then again, no one could praise her, either – a revelation that really pissed the ghost off to no end.

"You drive like a dead person," she told the oblivious doctor as they cruised slowly through the city, "no, wait, I take that back – you drive slower than a dead person! I'll bet I could go faster, and I don't even have a body!"

Since her untimely demise, Asuka had found that if she concentrated, she could make things happen in the real world. It had been fun at first, especially when Shinji screamed like a little girl and ran to his room when she'd pinched his butt while he was cooking, but she soon grew bored with it, especially after finding that it took a lot of 'energy' or whatever she had now, and made her feel sleepy.

An annoying situation, considering that she could not technically sleep, she simply lounged around feeling gloomy until whatever internal battery she now had reset itself.

So far, she had avoided thinking about what might happen if the battery ran dry.

"Are we there yet?" she asked blandly, resisting a rather sudden urge to poke the good doctor in the left breast. "I'm hungry! I've gotta potty! I want daaaaaddy!"

Asuka chuckled to herself as she ran through the driving clichés she had seen in movies, but her humor was short-lived.

What good was annoying someone if they couldn't hear you?

"I really DON'T have to potty," she said matter-of-factly, knowing that she was not being heard, but liking to speak anyone – if for no other reason than to know she still could. "Don't have to use the bathroom, don't have to eat, no PMS… well, I hope, I've still got a week until I'd normally start… being dead's not half bad, except I'm BORED OUT OF MY DAMN SKULL!"

Disgusted by her latest attempt (high volume) to get Ritsuko's attention, Asuka simply stared out the window.

"Where are we going, anyway?" she muttered. "You live on the other side of town, don't you?"

She was answered several minutes later as the doctor pulled up in front of an unfamiliar house, tucking her purse under the passenger side seat – and passing it through Asuka's calves – before checking her hair in the rearview.

"Hot date?" Asuka muttered, not allowing herself to believe it. "Well, I'll just wait here, I guess… got nothing better to do…"

Waiting, she quickly found, was far more boring than curiosity. After twenty minutes or so, she started to wonder who, exactly, the chilly blonde might be seeing. One of the techs, perhaps?

Miss Ibuki?

Asuka chuckled at this thought.

"Been listening to too many rumors."

With a hefty sigh, she oozed out of the car and started up the walk towards the house.

"White picket fence?" she muttered, shaking her head with wonder, "Please… drag yourself into the SIXTIES for God's sake!"

Letting herself in, Asuka cast around for the doctor. She figured that if anything… gross was taking place, she had allowed more than enough time for it to be over. She spotted Ritsuko's sensible shoes immediately, placed carefully side by side next to a pair of men's dress shoes.

Just to be a bitch, she reached out and nudged one of the shoes off-center.

"Damn obsessive-compulsive hag," she grumbled, wandering through the small, sparsely furnished house and trying to figure out who might live there. "No pictures on the walls," she noted absently, "not a speck of dust… wow, it's like Shinji's room, only bigger."

Such a shame she did not lock onto this thought.

Humming tunelessly, Asuka came to a closed door. "Bathroom?" she wondered aloud. "No, that's over there… hmm… study?"

Shrugging to herself, Asuka pressed her face against, then through the door.

"Oh my GOD!"

…it was, of course, the bedroom.

"EEWWW!" Asuka shrieked, yanking her head back with a violent jerk and shaking it to try to clear the vile image of the Commander's bare backside from her mind. "My eyes, my eyes!" She felt like she needed to brush, scrunching her eyes closed in a vain attempt to find another thought… but no matter how she tried, she could not clear it from her head.

"Oh man," she groaned, putting both hands over her stomach, "that is just WRONG!"

( 0 0 0 )

Halfway across town, between the time Asuka was wishing she still had the ability to throw up and deciding that even if she had not been dead she would never ever want to have sex if it was that… oily, Shinji was moping.

He was quite good at it, actually, having spent much of his childhood practicing.

Heaving a great sigh, he flopped over onto his stomach, shifting around for a few moments before flipping onto his back. He was doing his best to feel bad for Asuka… but somehow (being who he was) he just ended up feeling sorry for himself.

"Sorry," he apologized to the ceiling, imagining that Asuka was in Heaven frowning down on him, "I'm doing my best."

Finding no solace in misery, he dragged himself out of bed and made his way into the kitchen.

"Misato?" he mumbled, not even raising his eyes, "I can't cry… why won't the tears-"

"Kampai!"

Shinji blinked, finally lifting his head and finding his guardian peeking out from behind a rather sizable stack of beer cans.

"Wow," he said softly, "you're smashed, aren't you?"

Misato smiled drunkenly. "Shinji m'boy," she replied, "I am three sails to the wind."

There was a long, poignant silence.

"…what does that mean, exactly?"

"Hell if I know," Misato shrugged, lifting her beer to take another long pull, "just heard it in a movie once – means you're," she gestured Shinji closer, dropping her voice to a mock-whisper to concluded, "T-A-N-K-D."

Frowning slightly, Shinji murmured, "I think you forgot a letter."

"Don't correct your elders!" Misato said sternly, slamming her beer can on the table and sloshing some of it onto the back of her hand. "You just be thankful I'm in a good mood, young man, or I'd point out everything _you've_ done wrong… and believe me, that could take some time."

Shinji shook his head as his inebriated superior began licking the spilled beer off the back of her hand. Had he been an older boy – or one with normal hormones – he might have found the sight sexy… but all he could think was: _That is so unhygienic…_

"So what were you saying about sobbing like a little girl?"

"Er, that's not what I said," Shinji corrected, "I was just saying-"

"Beer?"

"Umm… no thanks, I-"

"Scotch?"

"No, I-"

"Rum?"

"No, really, I-"

"Bourbon?"

"Misato, I-"

"Vodka? Gin and Tonic? All the above?"

Shinji opened his mouth.

"Sex on the beach?"

Shinji closed his mouth.

He had heard of this drink – peach schnapps and other sugary alcohols, if he remembered correctly. Leave it to Misato to bring up a drink with a name that could be taken two ways. Oh well, he thought tiredly, anything to take my mind off how miserable I am… or should be.

"…ok."

"Great," Misato said, getting unsteadily to her feet, "and when we're done, I'll get you a drink!"

Shinji blinked as she grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the bedroom.

He wondered if he should point out that this was the way to neither the liquor store OR the beach, but he decided it would be wasted breath.

…after all, as sloshed as Misato was, Shinji very much doubted she would be able to get her clothes off, much less convince any body parts to interact the way they were supposed to. This notion was confirmed as the purple-haired woman spent several fruitless minutes searching for a doorknob on her sliding door while grumbling that someone must have stolen it.

Shinji just sighed.

( 0 0 0 )

After trying unsuccessfully to hurl, Asuka finally gave up and wandered down the street, feeling too grossed out to stay in the Commander's house or wait for the slutty Doctor Akagi to come back out.

Who knew how long what they were doing would take.

"Some questions are best left unanswered," the redhead muttered disgustedly. "Truly… that can't be good for her hips…"

Another advantage to being undead, she supposed, was that her feet did not get tired after walking for a long time. As a result, she found herself in downtown Tokyo-3 without so much as a twinge in her calves or a drop of sweat on her brow.

Not that she COULD sweat, but anyway…

"Guess I'll do some window shopping," she mused, still stopping for the red light in spite of the fact that the cars on the road would pass right through her.

Old habits and all that.

She glowered, however, as she caught sight of the First Child waiting on the other side of the street. "Great," she mumbled, "and here I thought I was going to be able to avoid her indefinitely."

The light turned green and the living Child started across, passing the deceased one with a minute nod and a softly whispered, "Souryu."

Asuka sniffed. "Wondergirl," she returned stiffly, lifting her chin and marching past the blue haired girl as she continued towards the shopping districts. "Honestly," she said angrily, "someone should teach that-"

There was a sound in Asuka's mind like a dozen cars screeching to a halt – ironic, considering that there was an accident two streets over at that exact moment – and whirled around.

"HEY!"

Rei was already halfway down the street by the time Asuka caught up to her, trying vainly to grab the First's arm before finally realizing that if the girl COULD hear her, she should probably say something.

"Stop!"

To her continued amazement, Rei did as she was told, coming to a stop and turning to face Asuka with a look of stressed patience.

"Yes?"

"Y-you can see me?" Asuka said hesitantly.

Rei nodded. "Yes."

When Asuka, still in a state of shock, said nothing more, the First turned away and continued down the street.

Asuka caught her a block later, running around to stand in front of the other girl to block her way.

Not that she really could, but again, she was still used to having a body.

"I don't believe it," Asuka said as Rei came to a halt once more. "You really can see me!"

Rei, on the other hand, did not look as impressed. "Yes," she said for the third time. "Excuse me."

As she stepped around the redhead, Asuka cried, "Hey, wait!"

"Yes?"

"Er… how come you can see me when no one else can?" Asuka blurted. "And why aren't you creeped out? I'm a GHOST!"

Rei simply shrugged.

"Oh this is great," Asuka said with some relief, "at least SOMEONE can see me. Hey, what do I look like?"

Considering her for a moment, Rei finally said, "You look…"

"Yeah?" Asuka said eagerly.

"…like a jellyfish."

Asuka's smile vanished.

"What?"

"A jellyfish," Rei repeated, not noticing that the Second's hands had become fists, and her brows were drawing down into a dark scowl, "you are… hazy and transparent, and your arms and legs seem thinner than usual, causing you to resemble… a jellyfish. Also," she continued thoughtfully, "your skirt reminds me of the dome-shaped part of the jellyfish – I believe it is called the bell – though the tentacles-"

"Alright," Asuka exploded, "I get it!"

Rei fell silent.

Wishing she could stomp her foot, Asuka said, "Where are you going?"

"Nowhere," Rei replied evenly, "I am simply walking."

"Why?"

"I had nothing else to do."

"…you're weird."

"Excuse me."

Once again, Rei stepped around the other girl and started to leave.

"I'm going with you!"

"Pardon?"

"I said I'm going with you," Asuka repeated, falling in step next to the First Child, "if you can see me and hear me, you can tell people I'm still around."

Slowly, Rei murmured, "Don't you think that might… alarm them, Souryu?"

"Why would it?" the redhead demanded, "Everyone would be glad that I'm still here!"

Rei did not affirm this, which annoyed Asuka quite a bit, but instead she made another salient observation.

"Do you feel that they would believe me…?"

"Of… of course," Asuka said slowly, "I can… push things around a little – I can prove I'm here."

Again, Rei had a counterpoint.

"And once they know you are here… how do you believe they will react? You are…" she seemed to be choosing her words, "non-corporeal now – a ghost, in your words. What is the common practice when dealing with restless spirits?"

Asuka turned slightly green as the single word response came easily to her mind.

"Exorcism."

"Indeed."

"Well… I'm still going with you," Asuka said defiantly, "you suck at talking to people, but I'm not going to roam the whole damn city looking for someone else that can hear me."

"Mm."

And so they started off down the street – the key to Instrumentality walking side by side with Tokyo-3's newest living-impaired teen… an odder couple, the world had never seen.

Continued…?

Author's Notes: note, note, note, note. There – notes by the author. What, did you expect something serious after that?

Pre-readers? Not here.

Feedback? Sure, feel free.


	2. The part with Video Games

Disclaimer: I don't own EVA. If the owners say to, I'll take this story offline. Thanks.

Tokyo-3 Afterlife

Part 2 of a few

The Existential Truth of – hey look, cake!

By Random1377

Every human being has a threshold for annoyance, from easily irritated thugs to long-suffering saints. Rei liked to feel that she fell somewhere in between, leaning quite heavily towards the saint end.

"Flat tire!"

She was starting to question this standpoint.

"Please stop that," she murmured, pausing to push her foot back into her shoe, "I am starting to chafe."

"Hey," the ghost of the Second Child countered, "at least you CAN chafe!"

"Yes," Rei murmured, "as well as trip, feel objects in my ears, and have my underpants exposed to passersby – I believe we have established all of these things quite firmly."

Folding her arms over her breasts, Asuka grumbled, "Oh come on… it was only one passerby, you didn't fall, and it was just my finger."

"Is that what I felt?"

"…I hope we're talking about your ear."

"What else would-"

"Hey look at that!"

Rei looked around in confusion, following Asuka's pointing finger to find… nothing.

"Oh well," Asuka said dismissively, "you missed it. Hey let's go to Hikari's!"

"Representative Horaki?" Rei murmured, scanning the area Asuka had indicated in vain for some sign of something extraordinary. "I do not know where she lives."

"I do."

"But you are dead."

Rei felt something whack her in the back of the head.

"…ow."

"I know I'm dead, dumbass!" Asuka fumed. "But I wanna see my friend."

"My point," Rei replied, rubbing the back of her head with a faint grimace, "is that she will ask how I found her residence."

"If it didn't take so much out of me, I'd slap you again – haven't you ever used a phonebook?"

"…no."

"What?"

"I have never had need of a phonebook before," Rei said evenly. "All of the numbers I require are within my cellular phone."

Asuka motioned the other girl closer. "Does Hikari know that?" she whispered conspiratorially.

"No, why-"

"THEN SHE'LL PROBABLY THINK YOU LOOKED IT UP IN A PHONEBOOK!"

Rei, who had very sensitive ears, went rather cross-eyed at this verbal assault.

"Yes," she said unevenly, "I can see your logic."

Asuka rolled her eyes as the First rubbed at her temples. "You people," she growled, starting off in the direction of Hikari's house, "I swear, I don't know how the whole damn city hasn't fallen apart since I died – you're morons!"

( 0 0 0 )

Somewhere else, a headache the likes of which had not been recorded or perhaps even dreamt of woke Misato from a deep, drooling sleep. She knew it was her own drool the second she pulled her face up from the small wet spot next to her face.

Shinji's drool would never smell that strongly of alcohol.

Putting her hands on either side of her head – mostly to keep the halves from falling apart – Misato thoughtfully murmured, "GUHHH!"

Somehow, she would never, NEVER quite remember how, she ended up in the kitchen, indulging in the oldest cure for a hangover.

"Hair of the dog!" she announced proudly, slamming her second can (she thought it was the second, anyway, it might have been her third) onto the table. "See, Shinji? That's… Shinji…?"

She frowned, noticing for the first time that the Third Child was nowhere in sight.

Rising to her feet, she absently grabbed a third (or fourth) beer. "Shinji? Where the hell are you?" she gently shouted. "And where's my shirt?"

It's amazing how an inebriated mind works since, honestly, this was the first conscious observation she had made on her lack of clothing.

At least her pants were still on.

Mostly.

"Torn," she muttered, plucking sullenly at the waistband, "damn, kid, learn to keep your hands to yourself."

Somewhere up in Heaven, an angel wept at the irony in this statement.

Remembering nothing of the prior evening, Misato went to her room for a shirt, frowning as she found that someone (must have been Shinji) had drilled holes in her door. There was also, she noticed, a small package marked Takaumi Hardware on the floor not too far from where she had woken up.

Opening it, she frowned.

"A… doorknob…?"

Yes, inebriation is an interesting thing.

Shrugging, Misato dropped the doorknob on the floor and set about searching for the Third Child to fulfill the simple equation in her mind.

Shinji, plus hungry, equals not hungry.

Again, the angels wept at the duality of the woman's still slightly addled thoughts.

With the added clarity of more beer in her system, Misato was able to quickly ascertain that Shinji… was nowhere in the apartment. "Strange," she muttered, starting to grow agitated as she found his room just as empty as the living room. "He wouldn't be in Asuka's room," she told herself, "Hell, he won't even stop making her lunch boxes. Kid needs to learn to let go."

Savor the irony of this thought as I tell you that Misato punctuated it by draining an entire can of beer in one pull.

No, there was no denial in the Katsuragi apartment.

"Ahh!" she sighed, crumpling the can and heading over to the phone. "I'll bet I know where he is," she told herself, "he's run away again. Better call Section Two in to find him…"

Perhaps, had she stopped to think, she may have recalled that it was a school day…

( 0 0 0 )

Sniffling a bit from her latest crying jag, Hikari went to answer the door. Her sisters, and father… and everyone else from her crush to her guidance councilor, had told her that she needed to start pulling herself together before she fell into a pit of depression so deep that the stars would seem closer than the light of happiness.

Or something.

"Coming," she called, wiping her cherry-red nose with a well-used tissue.

Pulling open the door, however, her misery (a very close relative to Shinji's) was forgotten as she found herself facing a very familiar face.

"Rei?"

The girl seemed almost annoyed to be there, though only someone who had known her as long as Hikari would even notice, as annoyance was expressed by a zero-point-two millimeter tightening around the girl's red eyes.

"Representative Horaki."

"Er, Ayanami, hi…" Hikari said with some confusion, "what umm… what can I do for you…?"

"I was wondering…"

Hikari realized that she was leaning closer to the blue-haired girl, hanging on every word.

She made herself stop.

"Yes?"

"…if we could play games together."

Though she was not exactly sure what she had expected when the enigmatic pilot had arrived at her door, Hikari would later reflect that this was definitely not it.

"I um, well… huh?"

"Games," Rei said patiently, "Video games. You… have a Genesis Revival Edition, correct?"

"Er, yeah… how did you know that?"

"Souryu told me…"

Hikari looked pained. "Souryu," she whispered, lowering her eyes, "right…"

"Why are you crying?"

Blinking, Hikari wiped at her eyes. "I wasn't," she lied badly, "I was just cutting onions… to make dinner…"

"It is nine in the morning."

"I er, start early – marinades and all that."

"…I see."

"Come in!"

Rei followed the class rep into the cozy little house, glancing over her shoulder with a look that clearly said, 'Must I be here?'

As Hikari's back was turned, she failed to see Rei stumble as if pushed.

"My room's this way," she said, tossing the tissue into a garbage can as she led Rei further into the house. "I'll have to set it up, though… I unhooked it a couple days ago because I usually… usually only play with Asuka…"

Abruptly, she broke into dramatic tears, bawling loudly for a moment until she realized that Rei was simply staring at her.

"Sorry," she murmured, clearing her throat as she continued towards her room. "Onion juice."

"…I see."

Hikari's room was as neat as the rest of the house, though far more full of stuffed animals. The walls were covered in posters of teen idols, and several unusual charms and figurines decorated the girl's desk. One in particular – a sheet of paper with the Kanji for 'ghoul,' along with several others – caught Rei's eye.

"Oh," Hikari said absently as the First picked the paper up, "that's a charm to ward off unwanted spirits."

"Does it work," Rei asked softly, considering the charm closely as the class rep shrugged.

"It must," Hikari said reasonably, "I haven't seen one yet."

"Mm."

"I can get you one like it if you're that interested," Hikari mused, turning her attention back to the game system's cords as Rei glanced thoughtfully at a seemingly empty space next to her and slowly brought her arm up to hold the charm out in front of her. "Are you interested in spirits and stuff?" she asked, completely missing the sight of an unseen hand smacking the charm out of Rei's hand, followed closely by the side of Rei's hair fluttering slightly as if from the force of an ungentle slap.

"Mildly," Rei murmured, rubbing her head as she gave the charm a rueful stare. "Very mildly…"

"Oh." Turning around, Hikari said, "Well, here's the controller."

Rei took it, considering it for a moment before Hikari seized it and gently turned it around to face the right way.

"Have you… EVER played a video game, Ayanami…?"

"Not that I can recall," Rei said blandly, running her thumbs over the smooth contours of the controller.

Hikari looked confused. "Why the sudden interest?"

Rei glanced briefly to the side, almost, Hikari thought, as if she was looking for guidance, before giving her short, mostly nonsensical reply.

"Because all work and no play makes Rei a dull girl."

"O… k…"

Shuffling to the side – partially to get out of Rei's way, partially to put more distance between herself and Rei – Hikari thought, she's gone loopy… poor girl must have cracked under the pressure of losing one of the other pilots.

As discretely as she could, Hikari stooped down and picked up the charm, hooking it nonchalantly to one of her belt loops.

That way, at least, if Rei's strange behavior was caused by possession by a vengeful spirit, she would be covered.

Oddly… she was sure she could hear Asuka's distinctive, German-influenced voice scoffing, "Dumbass…"

Naturally, she chalked it up to imagination.

( 0 0 0 )

"Well that sucked," Asuka complained, lacing her hands behind her neck and glancing behind her before continuing up the street. "Man, watching you play was almost as painful as my last dentist's visit."

"Perhaps you should have brushed more," Rei observed coolly. "As for your comment… I told you that I was not skilled in video games."

Asuka glanced over her shoulder again. "You could have at least tried," she muttered. "Hikari probably thinks you're a loser now, and… hey wait, she always did – no, wait… that was me."

Rei kept her face neutral, wondering suddenly if perhaps she too should step in front of an oncoming truck.

"What are you looking for?" she asked as Asuka looked back a third time.

Shrugging Asuka said, "Eh, I dunno… I just keep expecting a guy in black to pop up and tap me on the shoulder and say 'come with me, I have use of you,' or something."

"The Commander?"

Asuka growled. "No, idiot – the grim reaper!"

"Oh," Rei replied, averting her eyes, "I think you are safe from him."

"Why's that?"

"…intuition."

"Right…"

Rei said nothing more.

"Hey," Asuka said suddenly, "look over there – isn't that Ikari?"

Following the dead girl's finger, Rei found that she was right.

"Yes," she said calmly, "it appears to be."

Asuka scratched the side of her nose. "Should we help him, d'you think?"

Rei considered this, eyeing the pair of tall, black-suited men currently trying to stuff the protesting Third Child into a waiting car.

"I was just in school!" the boy's voice rose. "I'm not running away, honest!"

"No," she said finally, turning away to continue down the street, "things are as they should be."

Watching for a moment longer, Asuka sighed.

"Easy for you to say. Ganbatte, baka-san!"

Walking away from the melee, Asuka realized that most people WOULD be a little alarmed at seeing one of their roommates being shoved into a black sedan by a group of burly security officers, but for her… it was just another day in Tokyo-3.

Continued? Eh, who knows?

No author's notes, I don't feel like it.

No pre-reader, I don't feel like it.

Feedback is welcome… if you feel like it.


	3. Hey Buddy, can you spare a Shinji?

Disclaimer: I don't own EVA. If the owners say to, I'll take this story offline. Thanks.

Tokyo-3 Afterlife

Part 3 of a handful

How much is that Shinji in the Window?

By Random1377

Rei woke feeling groggy and ill-rested – not surprising, since Asuka had kept her up half the night pestering her to make prank calls to the Commander.

'Come on,' the redhead had coaxed, 'just once. We'll tell him we've found a new angel growing in the school cafeteria chili. It'll be great!'

Rei, who doubted that this hoax would be anything close to great, insisted that Asuka let her get some sleep, finally convincing the Second that if she collapsed from fatigue, the redhead would have no one to talk to.

And now, the phone was ringing.

Shaking off the memory of a particular disturbing dream (something about working on a pottery wheel while Asuka reached around and helped her, all set to some remarkably old, remarkably sappy pre-impact song) Rei answered the phone.

"Hello."

"Rei."

"Commander."

"Are you dressed?"

Frowning faintly at the odd question, Rei glanced down, her confusion growing as she found herself clad in a very revealing French maid's uniform.

"Er… yes," she murmured, "though not in my usual… attire…"

She trailed off.

A quick glance into the corner – where Asuka was laughing herself silly – told her who had changed her clothes… though how the ghost girl had managed this feat, and how the Commander knew that she was so clad, she had no idea.

Deciding that it was best not to ask such questions aloud, for fear of the answers they would bring, Rei simply said, "I will change. Am I needed?"

"Yes," the Commander said calmly, "you are. Please dress appropriately and walk to the corner of Sadamoto and Anno. I will meet you there."

The line went dead. Rei turned to Asuka.

"This was… remarkably immature," she murmured, pulling the maid's uniform off to find herself in a flame-red push up bustier and filmy, nearly see-through fishnet stockings. "Was this truly necessary?"

"Hey," Asuka shrugged, "when you don't sleep, you have to find something to occupy your time."

Rei pursed her lips, reaching around to fumble for the catch on the bustier.

She blinked, very much surprised to find it, "Padlocked…?"

Asuka coughed. "Oh, that," she said quickly, "well, you see… the store I, er, borrowed it from was a… well, I think the word is 'specialty' store, and umm…"

Rei did not like where this was heading.

"The key?"

Ghosts, Rei quickly found, still blushed.

"Wasn't with it. Didn't really notice until I had it on you… sorry."

Rei doubted that the girl _was_ sorry, as she abruptly burst into fresh gales of laughter, but as she was pressed for time (it did not pay to keep the Commander waiting) she simply threw her school shirt on and began buttoning it, thinking that the day was off to a rather bad start.

( 0 0 0 )

"Hey, I said I was sorry."

Rei ignored Asuka as they approached the corner Commander Ikari had specified. Not normally one to get upset over little things, the First could not help but feel justified in her current state of annoyance. _The bustier was one thing,_ she told herself as she reached the corner, _but Souryu always has to take it one step further._

Asuka grit her ethereal teeth. "Oh, so now you're not speaking to me," she grumbled, "very mature."

Glancing up and down the street, Rei found no sign of the Commander. She reasoned that the man must be on his way, so she leaned against the wall of a convenient building, wondering how much longer the Second Child was going to vex her before moving over to the other side.

_She should have joined the others dwelling within Lilith's breast,_ she mused as Asuka 'humph'd and crouched down to study a group of hard-working ants. _She is most tenac-_

"Ohhhh, preeeeeety giiirrrrrl!"

Lifting her head, Rei found a man in an expensive business suit and highly polished shoes approaching her. He had an obviously bleached smile, slightly oily hair, and wore sunglasses dark enough to protect his eyes from pointblank exposure to a supernova. He stepped up to her, holding out a handful of money as he rattled of a rather complicated sentence in English.

Still toying with the ants, Asuka snorted.

"What is he saying?"

If the man was bothered by Rei talking to the air near her feet, he made no sign, simply holding the money out with a huge, expectant grin.

"He said he wants to nail you."

"Yes," Rei replied smoothly, "I gathered that… but he seemed very specific, and my English is not good enough to understand everything he said."

Asuka got to her feet, wrinkling her nose as she said, "Well, I don't know as much English as I do German and Japanese, but I know enough to tell you that he's saying he'll give you three thousand dollars American if you…"

Rei's brow furrowed slightly as Asuka outlined the man's rather intricate personal wish list.

"Well that's just unsanitary."

"Rei."

Asuka jumped back as she turned to find the Commander standing where the pervert had been just seconds before… though in her mind, after seeing him with Doctor Akagi, it was just trading one pervert for another.

"What the…?"

She glanced around for the American finally spying a shiny looking shoe sticking out of a nearby dumpster. Next to the dumpster, two large Section Two goons were brushing their hands clean with obvious distaste.

_Well, there you go._

"Rei," the Commander said carefully, "your shirt is… lacking buttons."

Glancing down, Rei murmured, "Yes, it seems that the top four have been… removed."

Asuka put her hands behind her neck, studying the sky innocently as she began to whistle.

"I tried to use a safety pin," Rei continued, pulling the collar of her shirt forward for emphasis – and inadvertently pushing her breasts closer together, "but I-"

"Don't do that," the Commander recommended, averting his eyes as he gestured towards Rei's hands.

"Do what?"

At her side, Asuka was laughing out loud.

"And your shirt seems to have… shrunk?"

"Yes, it seems that when I had it dry cleaned, it was reduced by two sizes."

Asuka was now howling with laughter.

Under his breath, Gendou muttered, "How distracting. Anyway, we have a situation."

Stepping to the side, he motioned for the Section Two thugs forward. They vanished around a corner, returning a moment later with a very disgruntled-looking Major Katsuragi suspended between them. The Major, Rei decided, seemed to have sobered… and did not look happy about this situation.

"Oh, hi Rei," she said, waving as best she could with her arms clamped tight in fists the size of gorillas,' "Wow, you're just… popping right out of that shirt, aren't you? And nice bustier! It really makes your cleavage like, ten times bi-"

"Major."

"Yes, Commander?"

"Shut… up."

Pausing to rearrange –er, recompose himself, the Commander cleared his throat.

"Explain the situation," he directed, gesturing for the Section Two brutes to lower the Major to the ground. He raised a hand as Misato took a huge breath. "Be brief," he warned, "and be specific."

Looking put out, Misato loosed a gusty sigh, shrugging as she turned to Rei and informed her, "I seem to have misplaced my Shinji."

"Pardon?"

"Short kid?" Misato said by way of clarification. "Kind of whiny? Father issues? Likes music? Has a thing for chicks with huge kno-"

"We all know who Shinji is," the Commander interjected impatiently, "explain to the First what has happened."

"I lost him."

"How do you _lose_ a person?" Asuka demanded, planting her hands on her hips and glaring at Misato for a full thirty seconds before realizing that she was still, in fact, dead.

Rei, who was not currently dead, had the same question.

"How do you _lose_ a person?"

_Wow,_ Asuka thought admiringly, _same inflection and everything. First's kind of sexy when she gets all worked up._

Worked up, for Rei, meant that she was frowning… slightly. And that her eyes were flashing… slightly. And that her lips were compressed… slightly.

Emotions were not really her strong suit.

"Well, I was at home," Misato began.

"Drunk."

"Thank you Commander," she said, "I was going to leave that detail out. Anyway, I was at home when Ritsuko called to say she wanted a synch test on Rei and Shinji."

"Why?" Rei wondered. "We had one yesterday."

Misato shrugged. "Dunno," she admitted. "I think she just likes making kids dress up in skintight clothes. I mean, is there any REAL reason for the plug suits? The EVAs communicate with your _brain_, right? Why do we need clothes tight enough to see what you had for dinner, when your brain-"

"We're getting off topic," Gendou said quickly, making a mental note to destroy all records of the meeting wherein he had argued that tight clothing would be far more effective for nerve transduction, and that – naturally – women more affinity with their mothers, so, really, male Children would not be necessary.

_Damn that board of directors, he thought darkly, stealing another glance at Rei's prominently displayed assets, damn them to hell._

"So anyway," Misato shrugged, "when I went to Shinji's room I found him gone, and it looked like he hadn't slept in his bed, so I figured he'd run away, but usually when he does that, he leaves his cell phone, you know?"

"No," Rei admitted, "I did not know that."

"Yeah, well," Misato continued, "it's happened about four times so far."

"Four times?"

"Uh huh, it's like a hobby – but anyway, I tried calling him, and his phone just kept ringing, so we traced the signal and found it lying in the gutter right over there."

Following the woman's finger, Rei found that she recognized the area.

"Hey," Asuka said, needlessly whispering, considering that no one else could hear her, "isn't that where we saw Section Two shoving Ikari into the car?"

Rei nodded.

It was pretty clear to both of them that it was not, in fact, Section Two that had taken the boy.

"As you can see," the Commander murmured, "this is a rather delicate situation. We have been reduced to one pilot, thanks to the Major's bungling."

"Hey!"

"So if you see him, or hear anything regarding his whereabouts," Gendou went on, ignoring Misato's indignation, "you are to inform Section Two at once, understood?"

"Yes, Commander."

There was a moment of contemplative silence.

"Commander?"

"Yes Major?"

"…why are we meeting on the street?"

"To show the First Child where the Third disappeared."

"Umm, why?"

"In case she happened to see anything… we are very near to her house."

"Don't you think she would have said someth-"

"Commander."

"Hmm?"

"…I did see two large men forcing Ikari into the back of a car yesterday."

Everyone but Rei, Asuka, and the Commander fell flat on their faces.

"You… might have mentioned that sooner," Gendou pointed out with some irritation.

Rei shrugged, popping another button on her shirt. "They were Section Two enforcers," she said levelly. "Hutch and Starsky – the Americans."

"I fired them two weeks ago," Gendou grumbled, "they kept sliding across the hood of their car and scratching the paint."

"Ah."

"So what you're saying," Misato said slowly, "is that Shinji's been kidnapped by two former, probably disgruntled enforcer types with an axe to grind and a taste for pedophilia!"

"I… don't recall saying anything about pedophilia," Rei observed.

"Oh, they're sickos," Misato assured her, "Everyone knows that Americans are all sex fiends."

A groan from the dumpster may or may not have been an argument.

"Alright," the operations director said firmly, "first things first – we find him! Second… we kick some ex-employee ass!"

Abruptly, she marched off down the street.

"…where is she going?"

Remembering that she was practically talking to herself, Asuka threw her hands up in disgust. Rei ignored her as she knelt down and began playing with the ants.

"Commander, what are my orders?"

"Stay with the Major," Gendou advised, "she might be a bit flaky, and perhaps a touch neurotic, but she is a tactical genius, and since the criminals in question are ex-Section Two, they would know all of Section Two's methods. It would be best to use a wildcard like the Major."

"Then… why am I involved?"

Gendou rubbed his eyes. "Because the Major doesn't know her ass from a hole in the ground when it comes to faces," he said tiredly, "the only reason she knows you is because she sees you every single day… but before she knows a person, she keeps a picture of them in her locker with a sticker under it reminding her of the name. She once went an entire week calling me Commander Sakura because someone rearranged her locker without telling her. Tactical genius… interpersonal dimwit."

"I see. Goodbye then."

Bowing, Rei made her way down the street after Major Katsuragi, peripherally aware of Asuka tagging along behind… though she did not see the Second's huge grin.

Gendou watched them go with an expression of annoyance on his face. He really did not want to use Rei for this matter – but it was the only option. The former Section Two idiots would recognize any other agents, himself, or Ritsuko in an instant, so Misato had to be the one to find them.

The only reason these two agents wouldn't recognize Rei was because Gendou had kept them off of the rotation to protect her.

…after all, they _were_ American.

"Back to work," he told himself, turning towards his two personal guards. "Contact headquarters and let- whoa!"

With all the grace of a water buffalo, the high and mighty commander of NERV central fell on his face, cracking his glasses and giving himself a rather ugly bruise on the forehead.

"What the…?"

He frowned, rolling onto his back and looking down to find that – somehow… someone had tied his shoelaces together.

**To continue, or not to continue – that is the question**! Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous flames, or to take up arms against the sea of bad fiction, and by opposing, end them? To… bah, this is too hard. Let's just shorten it up and say I might continue, and leave it at that.

I didn't subject anyone to the tortures of pre-reading this chapter… kind of thought it would be like cruel and unusual punishment or something.


	4. Underage Drinking is bad, really!

Disclaimer: I don't own EVA. If the owners say to, I'll take this story offline. Thanks.

Tokyo-3 Afterlife

Part 4 of a number higher than 3

"Hey, watch the hands!"

By Random1377

Shinji was not feeling very good about life. Stuffed into the back of a car, pushed around, and ultimately cut off from the world by a rather bad smelling potato sack, this had to qualify as the most embarrassing experience of his life.

Or maybe the second, with being caught sneaking a peek at Asuka as number one… or third, since there was the time he accidentally groped Rei's breast when she was fresh out of the shower… and there was that one time he had to have a synch test completely naked and… the more Shinji thought about it, maybe this wasn't all that bad.

He was more nervous that he had been kidnapped (the bag over the head made him realize this wasn't a normal Section Two pickup) by two Americans.

Who knows how long it was before they stripped him bare and did unspeakable things to his poor adolescent body?

Americans, he knew, were not to be trusted.

"Get out of the car."

"Yes sir," Shinji murmured, finding that with a bag on one's head, and one's hands tied, getting out of a car was rather a tricky proposition.

After flailing around for several minutes like a fish out of water, he was hauled across the back seat of the car and planted rather roughly on his feet. In spite of this harsh treatment, he was still glad to be out of the car.

His ass was starting to fall asleep.

"This way, kid."

Shinji whimpered as he was shoved from the back, nearly falling forward as he stumbled in the direction indicated.

Behind him, one of the Americans muttered, "You sure this is a good idea, Starsky? I mean, his _is_ one of the Childs."

"It's Children, dumbass," the other replied, "and of course it's a good idea… do you know how much they'll pay to get him back?"

"Hey," Hutch (Shinji figured it was Hutch by simple subtraction) said, "how come they call each one 'Children,' anyway? You know, this one is the Third Children… but there's only one of him. I don't get it."

Startsky shrugged – Shinji just knew he did – and mumbled, "Who knows why they do anything in this backward country? Any country that hasn't figured forks out isn't worth a damn, if you ask me."

"Then why did we move here?"

"Where else can you buy panties in a vending machine on the corner?"

"Point."

_I knew it,_ Shinji thought desperately, _they ARE perverts!_

As he was lead deeper into whatever hideout the duo had taken him to, Shinji made a mental note to check the prices in the aforementioned vending machines.

For Kensuke, of course.

( 0 0 0 )

"How long are we going to follow this bitch?" Asuka muttered, lacing her ethereal fingers behind her ethereal head and wondering what would happen if she got literally bored to death after she was already dead.

Rei's expression remained neutral. "She _does_ seem to have Ikari's scent," she replied carefully.

The bitch in question lifted her head and uttered a low, mournful howl.

Pulling on the leash in her hand, Misato snapped, "Stop that, Ritsuko!"

"That is some kind of messed up," Asuka said thoughtfully. "And here I thought they were friends."

Ritsuko howled again, her eyes focusing on Asuka's general location as the ghostly redhead shook one threatening fist. Ritsuko could not _see_ the girl, of course, but her heckles were up… she knew _something_ unnatural was lurking around the creepy girl with the red eyes.

The unnaturalness of the creepy girl worried her, too, just not as much as the feeling that there was something malicious just behind her.

"Gott, I hate dogs."

"See why I named her that?" Misato asked Rei, yanking on the dog's collar. "Temperamental, whiny, and doesn't listen to a word I say."

"If she says, 'I almost named her Asuka,' I'll kick her right in the ass!" Asuka vowed, raising her fist in front of her eye and giving Misato her best death-scowl.

"I almost named her As- ow, hey! Something hit me!"

Rubbing her suddenly irritated backside, Misato looked around for her assailant, her eyes passing right over Asuka – which was probably best, considering the fingers the deceased redhead was holding up – before resting on Rei.

"Nah," she muttered to herself after a moment. "Couldn't be…"

"Major," Rei said quietly, "is it my imagination, or are we in the brewery district?"

Misato looked surprised. "Well, what'd ya know?" she exclaimed with an almost convincing gasp of amazement, "So we are!"

In hindsight, Rei decided, she really should have noticed their location sooner – not simply because of the strong smell of fermentation, but because of the snapshots of her commanding officer in almost every store window with captions such as, 'Our #1 customer,' and, 'Thanks for your support,' and the like.

If they had not been following the nose of a trained bloodhound, she might have questioned the Major's motives.

"We're close…"

"Close to Ikari?" Rei asked hopefully.

"No," Misato (predictably) replied, "my favorite bar. Say, do we have time to-"

"No."

"…thought not."

Asuka scratched at her nose – not because it itched, but because she felt like she had to have some kind of physical act to go along with her commentary of, "That all seemed rather orchestrated, didn't it?"

Rei did not seem to feel that this warranted acknowledgement, and simply shook her head.

As fate would have it, however, contrived or not, the canine Ritsuko _did_ seem to be rather interested in Misato's favorite drinking establishment. "Tell her to wait out here," Asuka suggested as Misato smiled happily up at the dilapidated old brewery, "if she gets inside, we'll be there all day… maybe all week."

Considering this for less than a nanosecond, Rei said, "Major, considering the fact that our… extra party member is uncomfortable with me, I feel it would be best if you remained out here with her while I go in to see if Ikari has been seen in this vicinity."

Misato, who had not listened to a word the First had said, glanced at her and said, "Hm?"

"Dumb it down," Asuka muttered, considering Misato for a moment before adding, "Way down."

"You stay," Rei said, pointing to Misato, then herself, "I go."

Pouting slightly, Misato mumbled, "I wasn't gonna drink anything… I just like the smell."

Asuka leaned over, quickly whispering something to Rei, who parroted it back to Misato word for word.

"If you're a good girl and stay right here, I'll bring you a treat."

Pursing her lips, Misato said, "You don't have to talk to me like I'm a child, you know! I'm an adult – an adult with more experience than-"

"A double."

"I'll be right here."

Stepping into the bar, Rei murmured, "She is usually harder to persuade."

"Probably still shaken up by my death," Asuka said pityingly. "I'm amazed she's holding together at all."

Rei scanned the room. "Odd," she mused, "I was under the impression that she was simply using it as an excuse to drink as much as possible."

"…yeah, I guess that does make more sense."

"Indeed."

"Ok, here's the plan," Asuka said, catching herself whispering and raising her voice to a near shout out of pure annoyance. "You go to the bar and get Misato's drink, and I'll head into the back room and see if Shinji's in there or not, got it?"

Rei admitted that this seemed like a simple enough plan, and the two divided forces.

Oh, my readers, then the mayhem truly began.

( 0 0 0 )

The place smelled like potatoes. Or at least, Asuka suspected that it smelled like potatoes – it just had that tuber look to it. Having no material olfactory anymore, she could only wrinkle her translucent brow and look with disgust upon the filthy rundown wooden hallway that the door in the back of the bar had led her too. The brewery, it turned out, was attached to a rather large warehouse, and the entire place looked as if it needed a top to bottom cleaning.

Looking disgusted as she stepped over a pool of some questionable looking liquid, Asuka decided that it was a good thing that everything served in the bar up front was fermented or distilled.

Who knows what kind of predatory new life forms were growing in this dump?

At first, Asuka had snuck down the hallway, but after a few minutes she had growled in frustration and started to stride boldly through the building, glaring around as if daring someone to notice her – or rather, kind of hoping that someone would, because honestly, the prospect of having only Rei to talk to for eternity (or until the First kicked the bucket) was NOT what the redhead would call appealing.

"Just my damn luck," Asuka grumbled, forcing her voice to stay loud and obnoxious, "why couldn't it be Hikari that could see me? Or Kaji? Oooo, wait," she said suddenly, "me, plus invisible, plus Kaji, plus shower, equals I know where I'm going to be spending the rest of this week!" Her elation faded as she walked through another door. "You know, after I get stupid Shinji back home where he belongs."

Two more twists and a turn later, Asuka found herself face to face with Shinji himself.

"Oh my God – that bitch was right!"

Of course, she was still dead, and Shinji was still unable to see her, so he continued to stare forlornly at what looked like a potato sack on the table next to him while occasionally scratching at his right wrist, where (Asuka could see) one of his handcuffs was irritating him.

Not as much as Asuka's current predicament was irritating her, however.

"Hey dork," she said angrily, "why don't you like, walk out of this place, huh? The door's unlocked, and there's no one in the hall, so why don't you just get off your ass and sneak out?"

Shinji looked up with wide eyes, and for a moment, Asuka thought maybe he had heard her.

Until he sneezed.

"Shiesse."

Parking her ethereal heinie next to the potato sack, Asuka rubbed her eyes.

"So," she muttered, "options. One – kick Shinji. Two – go back and tell my lush guardian that Shinji's in the back… and she'll have to go through a fully loaded bar to get to him. Three – go find dumbass Wondergirl and have her take on two enforcers and maybe get killed." She paused for a moment. "Mental bookmark – come back to option three for later consideration. Option four – unlock Shinji's handcuffs with key left by stupid ass kidnappers."

It was amazing to her that she had missed the fact that the handcuff key was hanging on a peg next to the door. Not half as amazing to her as the fact that Shinji was still sitting there like a dumbass, but amazing nonetheless. Shooting to her feet, she snatched the key off the hook (which took a lot of concentration on her part) and flipped it to Shinji. Sadly, the boy was looking the other way, and the key flew past the back of his head and landed with a barely audible clunk on the floor behind him.

Slapping herself in the forehead – and wishing she felt it – Asuka groaned, "Un… real…"

As she was deciding whether to hit Shinji or pick up the fallen key, the door banged open. It was the only time she was glad to be a ghost, because the door was opened so hard that it cracked down the middle, and had she been alive at the time, she would have been squashed into a thin red paste.

It was a very heavy door.

"Time to go, kid."

Shinji cringed in his seat as the hulking former Section Two agents came into the room.

_Those bastards,_ Asuka thought angrily, _they've been molesting him! Just look at him flinch! Damn Americans – you can't trust a single one!_

"Not the sack!" Shinji begged, his eyes flicking to the potato sack on the table. "Please, not that!"

Asuka, missing this visual cue, turned and ran through the open door. "It's worse than I thought," she muttered as she dashed back through the warehouse. "They're making him touch their-"

She cut herself off as she reached the bar and found Rei slamming a small glass down onto the bar.

"Oh man… are you kidding me?"

It wasn't the fact that the First was downing a shot that disturbed the ghostly redhead – it was the fact that she had downed (from the empty glasses in front of her) about eleven, and the fact that at least half a dozen bar patrons had money out to buy her more… and every last one of them was staring at the blue-haired girl's cleavage with undisguised lust.

There was also a small puddle of drool on the floor.

"I'm gonna be sick…"

Rei, whose cheeks were ever so slightly red, glanced in her direction, though since her eyes were unfocused, it was hard for Asuka to tell if she actually _saw_ her.

"What are you _doing?_" she demanded, storming over to the First and trying to seize the shotglass. She failed in this endeavor, as her incredulity and annoyance made it impossible for her to focus well enough to manipulate objects in the real world.

The answer she got was simple and to the point.

"Drinking."

_Ask a stupid question, _Asuka thought tiredly, _get a stupid answer._

"Shinji's here."

"Mm."

Asuka watched in mingled horror and awe as Rei deftly slammed back a double shot.

"We should… probably tell Misato… don't you think?"

Though normally a forceful person, Asuka found her words coming out slowly and hesitantly – largely because she was having trouble processing the reality of the sight she was beholding. Misato drank… well, more than most people would consider 'healthy,' but never (NEVER) had Asuka witnessed a spectacle like the First upending one drink after another.

As the bartender cleared a few glasses away, the redhead realized that – based on her pace – Rei had been drinking pretty much since she had stepped up to the bar.

Asuka felt that it was time for drastic measures.

"The Americans have Shinji handcuffed in a back room."

Rei paused with a shotglass halfway to her lips. "Oh?"

"Yeah," Asuka said quickly, feeling that a little embellishment could only help. "And it looked like his pants were unbuttoned… and his shirt was torn… and he was whimpering…"

Slowly, Rei set her glass down. "Is that right?"

Several of the barflies eased back – not because they had lost interest, but because generally, girls with red eyes and blue hair that suddenly started to talk to themselves and look around for something to hurt were best avoided, no matter how smashed they were, and considering the fact that the girl at the bar was not swaying on her feet despite having just drunk enough to drown a horse only added to this assessment.

"Show me."

A few more of the barflies backed away.

"They're leaving," Asuka said, quickly losing her awe in favor of her irritation, "do you have a gun? A tazer? A switchblade?"

Reaching into her pocket, Rei pulled out a small pocketknife. "I have this."

The rest of the barflies backed away.

"…right."

Though rubbing her temples did not ease her headache, the deceased pilot still could not stop herself from doing it.

"The major is armed, I believe," Rei pointed out, ignoring the fact that the bar's inhabitants had begun to slowly sidle towards the door. "We should tell her."

"Gee," Asuka deadpanned, "ya think?"

Without another word, the two pilots left the bar… but when they got outside, they found Ritsuko tied to a parking meter, and Misato coming out of the bar across the street, her eyes widening slightly as she spotted Rei.

"Er, hi," she said, quickly hiding what appeared to be a forty ounce can of beer in her jacket. "I, umm, thought you'd be in there longer."

"Clearly," Asuka groaned. "Quick, Wondergirl, tell her that Shinji's-"

A car pulled out of the alley behind the warehouse behind the bar behind the street (yes, that's a correct sentence) and sped off down the street.

"…probably in that car."

"Hey!" Misato said suddenly, "that looked just like Starsky's car."

Throwing her hands up in the air, Asuka voiced her opinion on the matter.

"ARRRGGHHHH!"

Continued? Who knows…?

Didn't pre-read…

Feedback if you want…

Blah…


End file.
